


Everything About You Resonates Happiness

by Fae_Fiction



Series: The Eight Months of Nothing (DGATGOT Bonus Content) [1]
Category: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
Genre: Autistic Dirk Gently, Bass - Freeform, Brotzly - Freeform, Cinnamon Roll Dirk Gently, Demisexual Dirk Gently, Dirk Gently Angst, Dirk Gently Being Dirk Gently, Fluff and Angst, Fluffy-ish, Gay Dirk Gently, Gen, Idiots in Love, Inspired by Music, M/M, Muse - Freeform, Music, Oblivious Dirk Gently, POV Dirk Gently, Secret Crush, but its still super cute, but there isnt a happy ending, its actually kinda sad, jic that isnt your thing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-22
Updated: 2020-10-22
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:46:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,793
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27141970
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fae_Fiction/pseuds/Fae_Fiction
Summary: Despite them being called "The Eight Months of Nothing", a lot of things happened in that time. Let's take a look, shall we?Dirk has a vivid imagination, to say the least. His fantasies of him playing the bass with Todd never left his head. In truth, it's all he can think about when Todd plays. That and how unfairly talented he is and how much he just wants to- NOPE! Not thinking about that one.So one day, his rash decision-making gets the best of him.
Relationships: Todd Brotzman & Dirk Gently, Todd Brotzman/Dirk Gently
Series: The Eight Months of Nothing (DGATGOT Bonus Content) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1981231
Comments: 2
Kudos: 10





	Everything About You Resonates Happiness

**Author's Note:**

> This is a new series of one-shots I'm starting that takes place in "The Eight Months of Nothing" before my book "Dirk Gently and The Ghosts of Time."
> 
> Feel free to leave any requests!

The thing is… Dirk Gently never does things in halves. Or anything less than one-hundred and ten percent really. He is always over the top and bursting with energy despite his not ever knowing anything. When you have the whole of the universe _basically_ living in your head it’s hard _not_ to be over the top. You’re always over simulated and it comes out in strange ways, no, screw that, he was done thinking that he was strange. He was normal. As normal as normal can be because normal doesn’t exist. He has a life, he has friends who love him for all of his absurdity. Life was great. And it felt at _peace_. 

But that's the thing, it shouldn’t feel at peace. It should never be at peace. Something inherently was very, _very_ wrong. 

No matter, he should enjoy his peace while it lasts. 

His hunches never lead to anything, anything other than Todd. His perfect Todd.

It was odd, his feelings for Todd. He never had felt anything like them before. 

On cases in the past, he would inevitably start falling for his assis-friends and in truth, every single last one acted like Todd did in the beginning. So inevitably that led to him leaving. Whether it be he was straight or just weirded out with Dirk. The latter of the two was the constant though. They would leave and Dirk would be thrown into life-threatening situations alone. And him leaving inevitably led to Dirk falling deeper and deeper into a pit of despair that no one would ever love him. Ever. Never ever. 

What was different about Todd was he stayed.

What was he thinking again? _Jeez_ , he had three points that got brought up but he got distracted as he always does. Anyway, these three points are integral to the story today.

One, Dirk never does anything in halves. 

Two, it was too quiet and his hunches never lead to anything but Todd. 

And three, he has feelings for Todd.

* * *

It was a cold January morning. The types of mornings you wake up and feel the need to be close to your loved ones. _Todd_. Oh, lovely, lovely Todd. His perfect aqua blue eyes, his perfect wavy brown hair, his perfect smile that always follows his perfect eye-rolls. 

As he sat up and stretched he looked out the window, the sky was a bright grey and little flurries danced in the wind. He looked over at the clock on his nightstand, 11. _Shit!_ He never slept this late! Oh, what did it matter? There wasn't any case. There hadn’t been anything unusual since they got back from Bergsberg.

He filled his kettle and put it on the stove, thinking over all that has happened, looking for any connections. Searching for hunches, nothing. There was never anything. Anything but… _Todd._

His hunches had been strange like that lately. 

_Be with Todd. Go to him. Hold him._

_Tell him_.

No, he was not doing that. That's when most of them left. He was too far in for that now.

As he poured the steaming water into his favorite mug and got out his favorite tea he smiled. He smiled because from the apartment below, Todd’s apartment, he heard the guitar. 

He didn’t have a name for it, he didn’t know any of the songs he ever played but he did recognize a few of them when they were played. Today he was playing one of Dirk’s favorites. He liked the ones where Todd showed off his skill. And damn was he skilled. He didn’t play any instruments but just listening to it he could tell how difficult and complex the song was. 

He could imagine his fingers skillfully moving up and down the neck, his right hand going back and forth between strings, angrily picking the notes. He could imagine the way he bopped to the music, the way he danced around his apartment. 

But then he switched to a new song before it was finished. The new song Dirk recognized, and while he liked it he didn’t enjoy it nearly as much as the other song. This one was more simple. But then… he liked it even more than the first one. Because this time, he heard the lyrics for the first time. 

_Everything about you is how I'd wanna be_

_Your freedom comes naturally_

He didn’t necessarily like it because of the lyrics. No, he didn’t want Todd to be anything other than himself. He frowned at the idea. But he liked it because it was Todd singing. 

_Everything about you resonates happiness_

_Now I won't settle for less_

His voice was smooth and hopeful. Dirk couldn’t help but feel the song was about someone.

_Give me_

_All the peace and joy in your mind_

_Oooo-oh…_

He wondered.

_Everything about you pains my envying_

_Your soul can't hate anything_

Farah was nothing like the song described. They had just broken up last week. Todd said he was fine, that they just worked better as friends. And while he wasn’t exactly sure he believed him, the song… It didn’t feel like it was about Farah, it had to be someone else.

_Everything about you is so easy to love_

_They're watching you from above_

But who?

_Give me_

_All the peace and joy in your mind_

_I want the peace and joy in your mind_

_Give me the peace and joy in your mind_

_Oooo-oh_

Dirk couldn’t help but feel it was about him. Although, realistically, he knew it couldn’t be. 

_Everything about you resonates happiness_

_Now I won't settle for less_

He was a lot like the song described… But no. Todd didn’t like him like that. He couldn’t. This song was most definitely not about him. 

_Give me_

_All the peace and joy in your mind_

_I want the peace and joy in your mind_

_Give me the peace and joy in your mind_

But oh…

_Oooo-oh_

How he wanted it to be.

Todd went back to playing the skilled songs Dirk much preferred. But he missed the sound of his voice. Should he go down and ask to watch him play? He did that a lot, but going down meant Todd would definitely _not_ sing. And he wanted to hear him sing again. He would just sit up here with his tea and his blanket, listening to him play while staring at the spare Mexican Funeral t-shirt he had given him.

No. He’ll go down and be with him. The universe told him to. And there was only one thing that he would ignore when the universe told him to. 

_Tell him._

* * *

Gathering up all the courage he could, Dirk knocked on Todd’s door. You could hear the amp buzz as Todd unplugged his guitar and shuffle to the door angrily. 

“Mrs. Davidson, I swear to God there is no rule in the building that you can’t play-” He opened the door. “Dirk!” Todd blushed slightly. _He’s blushing?! No, it’s probably because he was expecting someone else and is embarrassed that he yelled at me. That’s it._ “What’s up?”

“I- I um,” He fiddled with his jacket zipper. “I heard you playing and I thought m-maybe I could come and listen?”

“Yeah, sure! Of-of course! Come on in.” Dirk smiled. 

“You know, you’re really good at playing.” He stepped in.

“Nah,” Todd scratched the back of his head.

“I thought we were past this! You take compliments when they are deserved. You really _are_ good at playing. Especially that one that goes…” He mocked the guitar with a series of ‘duh’s and ‘na’s. 

“Oh! Plug in Baby? That’s one of my favorites. It’s super fun to play.” He walked back over to his guitar and plugged it in, the amp stopped it’s annoying buzz. “Want me to play that one?”

“Yes please!” He nodded enthusiastically. 

He started off with that familiar screeching. Normally it would annoy Dirk but it only lasted a few seconds before the riff began. And his mind didn’t have to do the work anymore. 

Todd never looked at him while playing. He always looked at the headstock and maybe looked over to Dirk every once or twice with a warm smile but he didn’t mind. Todd always got lost in his music. It was enchanting, the way he didn’t care about the world anymore. He only cared about the notes and he let himself get carried away. He always was a little nervous at first, but the second that riff hit he let go and leaned into every note. Fully feeling the music, Dirk could see it the way he moved his body with each change in his hand's position. It was almost as if Todd liked putting on a show for him… _No, he just likes the music_. 

But oh, imagining him playing just for Dirk. Well, he was playing just for Dirk right now, the difference being there was no one there but Dirk versus playing _for_ Dirk. 

And this is when we get back to our first integral point of today's story: One, Dirk never does things in halves. Especially when it came to his imagination. 

His mind vividly painted a picture of Todd playing and dancing like no one was watching, except there was, Dirk, his love. He wanted to show Dirk how good he was at playing, make him feel proud of how much of a talented boyfriend he had. Nothing sexual, although recently he had discovered those fantasies… _NOPE! Not thinking about those now._ Back to Todd playing. Playing for _him_.

There wasn’t much of a difference between fantasy-Todd playing and real-Todd playing, it was the difference in knowing that it was for him, that Todd would look at him while playing, only sometimes looking back at his guitar.

And also in this fantasy, Dirk would play the bass with him. 

Dirk would go along with Todd, follow his lead, looking deep into his eyes, showing off his skills too. They would play for each other. Only them in the world, only them and the perfect harmony of their song. Like they were made for each other. And sometimes still, it felt like Dirk and Todd were made for each other, not just fantasy-Dirk and fantasy-Todd. But real-Dirk and real-Todd. 

And then he remembered, he had some extra money! Oh, this was a very good idea. A very good idea indeed.

“TODD!” Dirk snapped Todd out of his beautiful music haze and back to reality.

“Is something wrong?!” He jerked his head over to Dirk, the last chord still ringing out. 

“No! Everything is perfect! I just had a wonderfully brilliant idea.”

Todd switched off his amp and swung his guitar strap off of his shoulder and put it down. “Ok, shoot.” 

“Do you miss jamming with Amanda?”

“Yeah…?” He sat down next to Dirk. “Why?”

“What if you jammed with me?”

“Dirk, you don’t play anything-”

“But I could…” He smirked.

“But you don’t.” And there was that look that no one else but him received.

“No, like… what if I took bass lessons? I have some extra money right now, not exactly sure how I do but I do.” _Maybe it’s the universe helping me out with an excuse to do things with Todd! Thank you, universe._ “And then I would learn bass and we could play together!”

“Actually…” Todd rubbed his chin, “That’s a really good idea.”

“Really?” Dirk’s eyes lit up. 

“Really. And I have a better idea that could save us some money.”

“What might that be?”

“The bass is the first four strings of the guitar. I don’t know bass but I know guitar, I could give you lessons! We could figure it out together.”

“I like that idea even better. You’re a fantastic assis-friend, Todd.”

“I’m not-” Dirk pushed his finger to his lips. _So soft... NO!_

“What did I say about compliments?” He lowered his finger.

“Fine.”

“LET’S GO TO THE MUSIC STORE!” He got up and began dragging Todd behind him. 

“Dude,” Todd laughed, “Let me get dressed first.”

“Right.” Somehow Dirk had managed to not notice Todd was only in a t-shirt and some boxers.

* * *

“Todd!” A large man with a red beard and a t-shirt with a strange marching-band skeleton greeted them from behind the counter at the music store. “Long time no see! I haven’t seen you in what? Almost a year? It’s like you dropped off the grid or something.”

“You could say that,” Todd replied.

“What can I help you and your boyfriend with today?” _Oh my God... Wait, isn't Todd straight?_

“NO!” Todd corrected the man, it stung. It’s fine. He was used to heart-shattering disappointment. And technically he wasn't so why was he even upset? “He’s just a friend _._ ”

“Sorry to assume. Usually, you only bring people you date here.” _He did? Oh my God... Wait, people, not girls, people... Never mind that._

“It’s fine, Jon.” He laughed it off. “ _Anyway_ , this is my best friend Dirk.”

“Dirk Gently.” He went for a card in one of his jacket pockets and extended it out to the man, Jon. “Have you noticed an acceleration of strangeness in your life as of late?”

Jon shot him a confused look, “No… can’t say I have.”

“Sorry about him,” Todd said. _Ouch_. Now that was something he could reasonably be upset about. “We run a detective agency now. We’ve been having a bit of a slow few months. He greets everyone we meet like that now.”

“Oh, well congratulations on your agency. Is that all you need?”

“No actually,” Dirk said. “I’m looking to start playing bass. So we’re here to get me one.”

“Awesome, dude! Always happy to see more people getting into music. ‘Specially with this talented guy over here.” He elbowed Todd with a wink.

“He is, isn't he!”

“I-”

“We take compliments now, Todd.”

“Right.”

“Well, our basses are on the back wall here...” Jon gestured to a wall when one immediately caught his eye.

Dirk jogged over and pointed at a butter yellow one looking at Todd, “I like this one. The universe likes it too.”

“Of course you do.” He laughed.

“Good eye.” Jon came over. “That one there is a Fender Player P Bass. Nice traditional sound and it’s C neck so it will be easy to play as a beginner. Looking at $700, but since you’re Todd’s friend I’ll give it to you for $650.”

“Well I was looking for something a little less than that when I was planning on paying for lessons but since Todd will be teaching me I think I can afford it. And it’s yellow so that’s always a plus.”

“I say get it, Dirk,” Todd said. “It will last you a long time. Plus the universe saying it’s good is always a plus. And yes, it’s yellow which is always good. Can he try it out, Jon?”

“Of course.” He took it off the wall and plugged it in. “And what’s the thing with the universe? Actually, I don’t want to know.”

* * *

“I’m so excited, Todd!” They just got back to Dirk’s apartment with all of his new stuff. Todd walked around to find a plug for the amp and Dirk sat on the couch and opened the bag in his lap. That beautiful yellow bass. He took it out and held it like he sees Todd hold his guitar, still staring at it. It was his, his bass. And it wasn’t a fantasy, he was going to play bass with Todd. 

“You should be.” He finally found a suitable spot for the amp. “I remember how I felt when I first started playing guitar. The feeling of the weight of the instrument in your hands, that rush you get when you do something right, the joy you get from knowing that the music you hear is coming from you. You’re going to love it, Dirk.” He plugged in the chord and brought it over to Dirk, sitting down next to him on his left. Sitting very close. _Very_ close. Too close, well, not too close. Almost not close enough. He could never be close enough. 

His head rang with countless alarms. Sirens echoed through his head. They sounded like fire alarms, tornado sirens, ambulances, thunder, alarm clocks, car horns. Red flashing lights almost blanked out his vision. _Todd is sitting close to me, very close to me. Shit, shit, shit..._

“I-um,” He gulped and held up the end of the chord. “What do I do with this?”

“See that hole over by the knobs?” Dirk nodded, “Put it there.”

“Ok.” He plugged it in and looked over at Todd. “Now what?” 

“Normally I’d tell you to tune it but it’s already in tune. So let’s just go over the basics.”

“Ok.” He choked out.

“So, the biggest string is low E, er… Just E, the guitar has two Es, the bass just has one. So forget what I just said, the biggest string is E.”

They sat like that for a while, going over “the basics”. What the different parts of the bass were, what the different strings were, how to use the amp and change volume and pitch. The basics. 

Todd spoke in a calming voice that made Dirk want to swoon. A voice they felt like hot chocolate on a freezing Sunday morning, like holding hands on a beach at sunset, like a piano playing the world’s most powerful love song. He could barely say anything other than “Ok,” “Uh-huh,” and “Yes.” And even those he struggled with. 

“Ok, you ready to play?” He smiled a smile that made Dirk feel like he would fall apart at any moment. In truth, he already felt like he had shattered into a billion pieces. Laying on the floor, ready to be walked all over. That was his life now.

“I, Yes, I’m ready to play is what I am.” Todd chuckled. _Damn it that laugh, just shoot me already. That would be much preferable to this betrayal._

“Ok. So you see these frets? 7 to 9.” Dirk moved down and counted to 7, then to 9. “We’re mainly going to stay in this rectangle.” Dirk nodded. “Ok, now I want you to put your pointer finger on G on the 7th fret.”

Dirk followed his instructions and pressed his pointer finger down on the thinnest string away from him, feeling the cold, ribbed, aluminum. “ _OW_!”

“Ok, you don’t have to put all of your pressure on it!” He laughed. “Ease up a bit.” His voice returned to that perfect angelic chorus. “And you can let go of the string for now.” Dirk nodded. “Ok, now take the base of your thumb and rest it on top of where the white part meets the yellow near the pick-ups.”

Dirk once again followed Todd’s instructions. “Like this?” He looked over to his left.

Todd furrowed his brows, “Close, but not quite. You’re a little too close to the neck.” He scooted over even _closer_ if that was possible. His thigh touching Dirk’s. _Shit._ The warmth and pressure were brain-melting, heart-wrenching. _Don’t panic._ The very center of his being glowed with warmth and happiness and his stomach dropped but in the best way possible. Todd took Dirk’s hand in his and guided it down closer to the pick-ups. He melted at the contact. His body felt electric, like it would float away to outer-space and sink to the Earth’s core all at once. _Shit, shit, shit._

Maybe this was a bad idea. No, this was definitely a bad idea. This was his worst idea. But God, he didn’t want it to stop. He didn’t want it to _ever_ stop.

“L-like that?” His voice trembled.

“Um,- yeah. Like that.” He let go and Dirk fell into darkness.

“So, um, what do I do now?” 

“Now put pressure on G on the 7th fret with your pointer finger again.”

“ _OW_!”

“It doesn’t have to be so hard!”

“Right.” Subconsciously he was intentionally checking to make sure all of this was real. That Todd was beside him, speaking oh-so softly, teaching him to play the bass. 

“Now pluck the string with your pointer finger.”

The guitar made a sound, a note. It made a sound and Dirk made it make a sound. Dirk made music. For a moment he completely forgot about his situation. “I made music, Todd!” He looked over again with a signature Dirk-y smile. Todd smiled back warmly. There it was, and he was back.

“You ain’t seen nothing yet. Now take your middle finger and put it on G on the 8th fret and pluck.” He did it again and smiled even bigger. “Now take your ring finger and put it on G on the 9th fret and pluck.” He did it again and smiled impossibly bigger. “Now put it all together, pointer, middle, ring. 7, 8, 9.”

And he smoothly went up the three notes and almost dropped the bass in excitement. “I did it, Todd!”

“You did.” He laughed as Dirk kept repeating those same three notes over and over, improving his rhythm and transitions each time he did. “Want to see something really cool?” He nodded. “Let’s try doing that, but do that on E, and then A, and then D, and then G.”

“OK!” Dirk quickly fumbled over the frets, the strings unpleasantly buzzing and clanging.

“Hold on, stop.” Todd grabbed Dirk’s left hand with his, sending sparks through his body. Adrenaline coursing through his veins at the speed of light. _Fuck, fuck, fuck._ “Go slowly, then speed up only when you’ve got it without any buzzing.” The bass wasn’t buzzing, he was. 

He leaned over, his head so close to Dirk’s he thought he would explode. He could feel his breath tickle his ear and his heart stopped. He had fallen off the boat. He was dead now. This was the end of Dirk Gently.

He wrapped his hand around Dirk’s, his fingers moving with his, guiding him as he pressed each note, feeling his rock solid calluses press on his knuckles. Calluses that represented his godship of music.

“See?” He let go and Dirk fought the urge to shiver as he moved away. “Now try it yourself.”

“O-ok.” He repeated the motions, moving up the scale of 12 notes. Only buzzing every once and a while, and he sped up. Moving more fluidly, still barely buzzing and then stopped and looked over to smile at Todd. “How was that.”

“That was great, Dirk!” He gave him an affectionate pat on the back. “You’re a natural! We’ll be jamming in no time.”

“You really think so?”

Todd smiled with every cell in his body. “I know so.”

**Author's Note:**

> In case you can't tell, I'm a bit obsessed with Muse...  
> Even that "skilled song" Dirk doesn't know the name of is Muse, specifically "Small Print"  
> But like... Todd would have so much fun playing "Small Print" and "Plug in Baby", the guitar in them is *wow*  
> Incase you can't tell, it is my personal goal to be able to play that song or meet someone who can
> 
> Also, it isn't explicitly stated here that Dirk is Demi but he is, and it isn't specifically stated that he's autistic but he is. It *is* explicitly stated in my book, DGATGOT, which this is in the time-line of.


End file.
